35 Authentic Conversation Starters

There is no doubt that when others ask us questions that stop us in our tracks, we can’t help but want to engage more with that person. We suddenly are intrigued by this weird human and want to answer their question, but understand them as well?

And then boom! We crave human connection; it is in our DNA.

I have struggled with making valuable connections with other people for almost my entire life. Growing up, I was bounced around from many different schools and going back and forth between two homes. 

As humans, we lust for interactions (most of the time). I had to teach myself the best ways to come out of my shell. I figured I would present myself as raw as possible and open a world of connections through weird but intriguing questions. 

I have been working on this strategy for about a year now with friends and coworkers. To my surprise, very few people dislike it. I have found that people look forward to conversations like those because it makes them think about things they have not thought of yet. 

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Conversation Starters for Coworkers

In the workplace, you want to remain professional. However, you might seek out a relationship with the people in your field. I have compiled a great list to get started with some thought-provoking ideas. 

1. “How do you think your life would change if you could see your entire future? Would it impact your current decisions or alter them?”
2. “What is one question that seems to be unanswerable that you wish could be answered? No matter how much you ponder it or research it, there is no definitive answer?”
3. “If you could achieve the consistent state of happiness but had to give up everything you valued, would you do it?”
4. “If you could give your younger self one piece of career advice, what would it be? Would it change where you are right now?”
5. “What is a personal goal that you are working towards that you haven’t told anyone? What is your plan to achieve this goal and what will you do after you achieve it?”

When asking coworkers these types of questions, you can always figure out something about yourself in their answers and see if you align with their answers. 

This is a great way to get the ball rolling and create new relationships in the workplace that have a new and deeper meaning.

Games with the BEST conversation starters:

Tell Me More Game

A card game to deepen your connections with others (family, friends, and relationships).

Ice Breaker Game

This game is like Jenga. It has an outstanding number of different questions for many types of people. It could be great for team building, or just getting to know one another. 

The Hygge Game

This card game is great for playing with your loved ones. It also has that “deep conversation” aspect to it and can spark great authentic conversations with each other.

Conversation Starters for Friends

Whether you are trying to have a deep conversation with old friends or new ones, these will definitely create a stronger bond between you two. 

1. “If you could live in a fictional reality, tv show, book, or movie, which one would you choose and why?”
2. “What is a skill or talent you wish you had and if you had it, would it have big impact in your life? Do you think you could achieve it if it was a skill you could learn?”
3. “If money was not a factor, what would be your dream career? Would it change your life now?”
4. “What is an unusual tradition that your family that your family or culture does that you find interesting or unique?”
5. “If you could invite 3 individuals (dead or alive) to a dinner party, who would they be and why?”

These are awesome questions to ask new or old friends. I have used some of these myself to get my friends thinking and get me thinking as well. There are so many other conversations that can spiral off of one of these questions. 

Conversation Starters for Family

When it comes to holidays and gatherings, starting conversations with family can be difficult sometimes. These conversation starters will surely guide you to a positive discussion with family members.

1. “What is something you have accomplished and how did it make you feel? Did it change your perception on life or your values?”
2. What is a piece of advice from a family member that has changed the way you think or you perception of life?”
3. “Is there a family recipe that you consider valuable? Have you passed it down the family tree and encouraged people to continue making it?”
4. “Are there any family traditions you want to implement or change? Why or why not?”
5. “Are there any values that you think are important for the family? What are they”

These questions can help facilitate meaningful conversations and strengthen family connections.

Conversation Starters for Kids

For some people, speaking with children comes naturally. If you are anything like me, sometimes it can be a bit difficult. Here are some great topics to touch on with kids of any age!

1. “If you could invent anything to make your life easier today, what would it be and why?”
2. “Have you read any new books or watched any new movies recently? What did you like or dislike about it?”
3. “What is something that you look for in a good friend? Do most of your friends have this one thing in common with each other?”
4. “If you had a magical pet, what would their powers be and what would you name it?”
5. “What is the first thing that you do after school? Is it fun or boring? How could you make it fun if it is boring?”

These questions can help you connect with children and spark their imagination and creativity.

Conversation Starters for Neighbors

See your neighbor outside working on some stuff around the yard or bringing in some groceries? Maybe you guys made eye contact? Or maybe you want to get to know your neighbors! Here are some great ways to get on a mutual level!

1. “Have you done any DIY projects around the house recently? What was it and how did it turn out?”
2. “I am looking for a new show to watch or to read a new book, anything you recommend as of recently?”
3. “Do you have any recommendations for landscapers or handymen? I am looking for something reliable.”
4. “I love the way you decorate your home for the different seasons. Is there anything you recommend or advice you can give me about revamping my house for the different seasons?”
5. Where is hidden gem that you have found locally that you would recommend? I am looking to try something new this weekend?”

These questions can help you engage with neighbors and discover shared interests or helpful local tips.

Conversation Starters for People You Really Wish You Weren’t Talking to

Sometimes we are forced to talk to individuals we don’t necessarily like. Here are some good ideas to keep a conversation flowing but also in a neutral and respectful way. 

1. “Do you have any upcoming travel plans? Are you excited? What travel destinations would you recommend?”
2. “Have you tried any new restaurants or recipes lately? Do you like them, and did you tweak them at all to make them your own?”
3. “What kind of music are you into these days? Anything new you have discovered?”
4. “I heard you got a new pet! What is their name and how are they doing?”
5. “I am looking for advice on home improvement, have you done anything new to your home that you like and would recommend?”

These questions can keep the conversation flowing while remaining polite and neutral.

Conversation Starters for Couples

Sometimes on date nights there could be crickets. Other times all you do is talk back and forth. On days with crickets, here are some ideas to get the conversation moving!

1. “How can I better support you when you are feeling stressed or overwhelmed?”
2. “If you could live out your dream day, what would you do and why?”
3. “What is something that you love that you want me to try with you?”
4. “What is one thing we could do to make our time more meaningful and valuable with each other?”
5. “What is a milestone that we have reached that you are proud of? Or what is an obstacle that we have overcome that you are proud of?”

These questions can help deepen your connection and make your time together more enjoyable.